Dr. Curry weighs in on how to help kids learn from failure
Kids fail. It’s your reaction that counts
By Patrice Apodaca
June 4, 2016
Our children will fail sometimes. It’s an inevitable part of life, said Dr. Shannon Curry, a clinical psychologist who frequently addresses the parent-child dynamic at her Newport Beach practice.
Frequently, however, parents make these failures more about themselves, she said, by seeing their children’s missteps as a reflection of their parenting or as a personal disappointment. Some parents react by become angry, embarrassed or hypercritical. Others go the opposite route and make excuses for their children’s shortcomings. Some intervene too forcefully or to try to fix everything for them.
That isn’t to say that parents shouldn’t use discipline or take strong measures when their children are out of control. But too often, Curry finds parents responding to their kids’ problems in inappropriate and unhelpful ways, rather than in a manner that nurtures children’s capacity to persevere and work through difficulties in healthy ways…